First I would like to let Allisone know, that I did not in fact float away…

I rained most of Saturday off and on, but we were able to get a cheapo Xmas tree at Le Depot de Home. Bear kept asking and asking, so I splurged. It didn’t really seem like Christmas season.

I am a usually a Christmas freak. I decorate, nothing can get me down, I spread cheer and love throughout the land. I am trying, I really am, but I am just not getting the ‘feeling’ this year. Everything is just so different and weird I guess. I will post more about the tree/decorating/feelings about Saturday (with pictures!) over at my 365 this evening.

I was down hearted last night. I just had some personal stuff that I would have loved to blog (I like to use you guys as a sounding board), but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I find myself censoring and also thinking this place is just not anonymous enough (Hi kids! I love you!). No one to blame but myself in that department. I am the one who told them all about it and I love that they share all this with me every single day! But the truth is that statement alone is gonna have them all over me like flies on sh…..ya know what I mean.

The other day someone asked me, “What do you need? What do you want?” They weren’t asking in the profound way that I felt it, it was meant in a superficial and literal way. But I found that I immediately interpreted it in a figurative, emotional way that interfered with my ability to answer. I said I would have to think about it, and get back to them. And that is what I have been doing, thinking about it. I am thinking long and hard, and when I know the answer (du jour) I am going to share it with you all.

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